I'm starting something new. A way to get out there. Out there in a way that, well, I've never been before. When I was a kid I wanted to be an explorer. I was devastated to find out that all the blank areas on the map had been filled in. Then I wanted to be a paleontologist, and worried that all the dinosaur bones would have been found by the time I was an adult. It turns out not all the bones have been found, and although there aren't many blank areas on the map these days, that shouldn't be a dissuasion from exploration.
How to Be a Poet
(to remind myself)
i
Make a place to sit down.
Sit down. Be quiet.
You must depend upon
affection, reading, knowledge,
skill—more of each
than you have—inspiration,
work, growing older, patience,
for patience joins time
to eternity. Any readers
who like your poems,
doubt their judgment.
ii
Breathe with unconditional breath
the unconditioned air.
Shun electric wire.
Communicate slowly. Live
a three-dimensioned life;
stay away from screens.
Stay away from anything
that obscures the place it is in.
There are no unsacred places;
there are only sacred places
and desecrated places.
iii
Accept what comes from silence.
Make the best you can of it.
Of the little words that come
out of the silence, like prayers
prayed back to the one who prays,
make a poem that does not disturb
the silence from which it came.
I don’t believe people who say talking about the weather is uninteresting. Mundane, surely, but in the mundane is real experience. One of my favorite kinds of knowledge to obtain is the sense of seasons of a place. In Portland, so many months are dreary, or at least subdued. Low clouds and the lack of raw sunshine are much harder than the rain. But spring and summer in Portland, few things match the perfection that this place can reach during these months. The clean air, emergent sunlight, and birdsong delicately erupting all around. So perfect you could almost scoop it with a spoon.
Here are some of my favorite quarantine activities, in no particular order.
Dungeons and Dragons. Nothing beats escapism right now, especially while hanging out with friends via video chat. If you’re just getting into it, I’d recommend getting the starter set and sticking to pen and paper. It’s just more fun that way
Cooking new recipes. I signed up with a new food delivery service (Milkrun), which means I’m getting vegetables I’d never normally order delivered. Keeps things from getting repetitive, and I’ve only wasted one batch of collard greens so far.
Animal Crossing. Not a game I’d normally play, but yes, it really is the perfect game for this period of time. I got the physical edition so I can resell it when I’m finished with the game. Best Buy seems to have them in stock, and offers safe pickup from their stores.
Apple Arcade. I’m finding that my attention span is even more diminished during the quarantine. It’s just hard to hold focus, even on things I find enjoyable. Sticking with one game for several hours isn’t working, so the flavor of the month assortment that Apple Arcade offers is perfect right now.
Jazz music. If you live in Portland you probably already know how lovely KMHD is. If not, go check them out. I listen to radio via the TuneIn app since I’m not in my car much these days. It’s a great way to feel connected with your community.
Macro flower photography. I’m not taking too many “real” photos these days, but spring is lush and in full force in Portland. Getting beautiful flower photos with my phone has been a welcome treat.
It’s the little things, right?
It’s always the bittersweet things that get me. The drone footage of mass graves being dug in New York had me incredibly down. But somehow, it was the celebrations for those who are on the front line, especially health care workers that made me weep. Signs of such courage. I am shocked at the bravery it must take to go to work every day seeing what they see, especially in a place hit as hard as New York. The noble, stubborn, compassionate human spirit being celebrated in the best way we know how.
I’ll go bang some pots.
This week was heavy. Somewhere between Joe Biden being the democratic nominee, hearing The Daily episode about the Wisconsin primary, and whatever awful thing Donald Trump said or did, it really hit me. That and the slow realization that this (this being the pandemic causing massive death, disruption, and suffering) is the kind of economic changeover we would need to be at in order to stave off climate change. And since that’s impossible, or at least highly improbable, this state of the world will become much more familiar. I won’t let myself say “when things return to normal” because I’m not sure there is a normal to return to. Coronavirus is lifting up the rock and exposing so many things that are wrong with our world, and especially things here in the US.
Bleak.
All that, and it’s gorgeous outside. The birds are talking about how we never go out anymore. The flowers bloom with a radiance that’s all the more alive. It is so asynchronous with the information going into these same eyeballs, of new infections, of death rates, of incredible economic damage. Beautiful radiant spring, in stark contrast against such human troubles.
Still, it may be trite but it’s also true, I’m so thankful to be alive.